Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, it's not going to get better... it's not.
– Dr. Seuss
"What does that mean?" one of my young kids asked me as we just finished watching The Lorax.

I tried to explain that everyone can make a difference in the world... no matter how small. That if something is important to you, it is probably important to a lot of other people, too. So here I am, beginning a blog... a story... about our son, Eli. Hopefully, we can share our experience, our worries, our research and help even just one other family with a child like Eli. But mostly, I'm doing this for Eli so he can someday learn about how it all began.

Since his health– anyone's health– is such a personal thing, I will attempt to keep identifying details private while sharing the true journey as best as I can.

Baby Brother on the Way!

My pregnancy with Eli wasn't planned, nor was it avoided. We had two beautiful children– a son, 5 and a daughter, 4. My husband and I had always talked of at least one more, maybe two. When we discovered we were expecting, everyone was excited!

Like my previous two pregnancies, this one was hard on me. I love the idea of being pregnant, but my body isn't very good at it. I don't struggle with severe symptoms, but it's enough to make me grumble. I had the usual heartburn, a little nausea, backaches, blah, blah... I even had a sinus infection that landed me in the ER in my first trimester. But it was my pinched nerve/sciatica/tilted pelvis thing that drove me crazy!  By my 5th month, I couldn't walk or stand without my left thigh going numb. By my 8th month, I was ready to cut my leg off! Anyway, my pregnancy felt like my others had. My normal. I had no idea that the cells working inside me weren't quite doing their job perfectly.

At my standard 20 week ultrasound, we found out we were expecting a boy!

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    Eli's Mom

    I'm the lucky one... the mother given this handsome, happy child. I'm probably a little like you– scared, concerned, and stressed. I've spent all day and long nights trying to learn more and searching for answers. How did this happen? How can I make things better? What could happen next? How can I explain this to family and friends? What do I tell his brother and sister? But now, I realize that having all the answers isn't what HE needs right now. He just needs me to love him. I can definitely handle that.


    January 2013